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Me and Layali at the Kuwait Riding Centre

Those of you who have ever built up a close relationship with any animal will know how much it enriches your life.  An animal can become so much part of you, that you cannot imagine your life without them and you think that you will always be together – this is the stuff of dreams and fairytales – the truth is that you often have to make decisions which are best for your animal and put your own feelings to one side.

Yesterday we were booked at quite short notice to go and photograph a young woman and her beautiful horse.  What I hadn’t realised was that her horse had been sold and was leaving her soon and she wanted to capture something lasting for her to keep.  She had made the difficult decision to sell her horse as circumstances meant that it would be difficult for her to keep him, luckily she found him a fantastic home where he would be able to continue with his competition career.  So the lady in question made the brave decision to part with him and was understandably upset, but she will be able to keep tabs on how he is doing and has some stunning images from Nigel to keep.

Now they say that time is a great healer and all that, but when I was going through the images last night it became quite clear to me that the grief I felt about leaving my first ever horse is still with me.  You will find no photographic tips or subtle adverts within this blog, just a story about a much younger version of me and a horse.

I was lucky to get a teaching job in Kuwait just after the Iraqi invasion when I started my teaching career.  The flats that they provided us were pretty much out in the desert and I remember when I used to explore around the area I was sure that I could smell that distinct smell of hot horses.  I managed to find them one evening.  I found a large compound I would call it with metal gates all around it and I saw a lovely grey arab going inside.  Now seeing a woman wandering around in the desert, especially a white one, was quite rare.  I was invited inside for tea and for a look around at the horses, invited to ride their quietist Arabian stallion, managed to ride it reasonably well and not make a fool of myself and was invited back.  And so it went on, I used to visit the stable and ride a variety of horses every evening once the heat of the day had gone off.  My Arabic got better and the English of  the two Kuwait brothers who owned the place and the numerous grooms got even better.  I became part of their family, they looked out for me and I looked out for them.

One evening I remeber getting to the yard and there was great excitment around one of the stables as one of the owners family had bought themselves a ‘race horse’.  I remeber looking into the stable and seeing the most angry and aggressive horse I have ever and probably will ever see.  It took two grooms, each armed with a wheelbarrow to push her into the corner to allow a third groom to put hay into her manger.  She had raced a few times but her temperament and aggression meant that she would not be going back to the track again.  A big part of her problem was that she was jet black and many of the older members of the family at the stable strongly believed that “a black animal has a black heart”.  I however thought that she was beautiful, a modern day Black Beauty with a bit of a personality problem.  The next day she came to the door of her stable and took a polo out of my hand despite the grooms all yelling at me to keep away.  And so it went on for a couple of days, the more fuss I showed up over the stable door the more she showed it back to me, not rocket science I know but to men that had just lived through their country being invaded, it was a little odd, ‘the English girl has had to much sun”.  I was then told she was to be sold and after them quoting that she was worth thousands of Kuwaiti Dinars I offered them 100 Dinars (which is about £200) and then deal was done!  So I had to wait about 22 years to buy my first horse and then I buy one that I hadn’t ridden, was extremely difficult but was absolutely  very beautiful.  I was assigned a groom who suggested that as she was about to start a new life with me, we should give her a new name – so she went from being ‘Dana’ to ‘Layali’ which in arabic means ‘my nights’.

I won’t bother you with the details of our journey together, but basically with lots of patience, kindness, knowledge and determination I managed to get her from aggressive racehorse to calm riding horse in the space of about 6 months.  I learnt more about myself in those 6 months than I have learnt in my whole life.

Of course she was far from perfect.  One of her biggest problems was she was really difficult to mount and have her girth done up.  My groom suggested that I get on her from the other side and do the girth up from only one side, I tried it, it worked, I carried on doing it.  She also seem to associate white dressage boards as racecourse running rails and I spent many frustrating competitions coming up the centre line in working trot, track left, spot the white rail, breaking into full gallop and disappear into the desert.  We got there inventually, working together, she was the sort of horse that you had to suggest things to rather than ‘tell’. The one thing I never did with her was to lose my temper.   She loved to go out on long rides which we did every weekend from the yard.  It was quite a sight, 20 or so riders all on stunning arabs and my black mare cantering across the desert with a pack on dogs following us – great times.

I used to go back to the UK in the summer for a few weeks, Layali would be turned out in a paddock for the summer.  My groom used to tell me that she always knew when I was coming back as she would get really restless the day before, now I don’t belive this for a minute but it was nice to hear.

Ready for dressage!

But of course things change, your life changes and I couldn’t live abroad forever so after 8 years I had to return to the UK.  Yes of course I looked into bringer Layali home with me but she would never have coped with the stress of the journey and she had come so far from the angry animal that I first met I couldn’t take the risk of that side of her personality returning.  I heard horror stories of horses freaking out on plane journeys and having to be put down, so I made the difficult decision of leaving her in the yard where I knew that she would be content.  And then after that your life together becomes a succesion of goodbyes – last competion – last hack -last time of sitting in the paddock with her – last time to stand and talk noscience to her over the stable door and then I left and she was gone from my life.  The sad thing is that I remember the very first time I saw here like it was yesterday but I do not remember the last time, I think that it was of those incredibly painful moments that you put to the dark depths of your mind – it is in there somewhere but I don’t want to see it.

And that’s it, our story, the story of Layali the ex-racehorse and the English girl.  I heard from the stables a few month after I left that they had put her into foal to one of their best stallions – and I can only hope that she has lived out her days in luxury.  Of course I now own two beautiful ponies that I adore, but they say that you get a ‘once-in-a-lifetime- horse’ and Layali was mine.  Goodbye dear friend.

Same I didn't know Nigel when I had her - I have very few photos of her

Schooling in the sand

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